Jibber Jabber 2005
i wasn't born a ramblin' man because when I was born i was a babyI always end up laughing at myself at my own expense. It is fun for a while but then I realize who it is.
why not want the inevitable?
Laughing is good for you. I'm doing this to save your life!
If I were really smart I'd say what people understand
i figure I'd get a good response as an online comic
everyone would be laughing out loud
like the only thing grown ups draw is lottery tickets
that reminds me of the times i put on shoes
wow a lot of memories
I don't watch movies. I watch my wrist.
This is for your 2nd term as mayor
Pirates will breathe the word danger.I'm your biggest fan said the wind.
someone was sitting on my suitcase & i was like "get off my case!"
I don't call what I do typing. I call it typoing.
A Gay Carpenter Handy & Dandy
You know what people used before they had dryers? Laundry mats.
I like our past. I'll love our future. But right now I am fixating on our oh so pleasant present.
where does your so go?
Do you have any idea about thoughts?
No matter if I looked to my right or to my left the time I would find from my watch I would get.
I'm gonna start walking & then gradually walk faster to find out if I speed up. Wow that didn't take long.
You best watch your mouth & wash your mouth because words ain't the only bad thing coming out. Yuk!
I don't mind rep..
But I do mind saying things the first ti..
i thought I had a bucket for a while but then it turned out
so I had an inside out bucket
if I wore the bucket as a shirt people would tell me to tucket
because they aren't elllloquint inought to say tuck it
was this all part of your plan
to get me to sit where I once would stand?
It ain't gonna go away until it is all ok. It's never gonna be ok until it all goes away.
How many kids do you want? As many that want me. :(
Ever prank-called anybody? Not on purpose
What color lipstick do you usually wear? The invisible kind
Are you a good cook? you can still recognize what I cook
Ever thrown up in public? Everywhere is public even when you are alone
Did you have a lot of hair as a baby? Not like when I was a man
What was the name of your first pet? Well it doesn't remember my name either..
What kinda backpack do u have? The traveling kind
Who is your best friend of the opposite sex? Wait what sex am I?
What do you think about most? Hmmm
if my memory were as good as it says it would be more selective
i don't use profanity (ever) but my appearance may be so atrocious to some that they consider it to be profane
Piemerica: Colossus of the vegetable community.
you want to be a member of Piemerica & take a waste of time sign up sheet & be profiled on a nobody goes to site?
joining Piemerica really only consists of being profiled on the site, getting bothered by me, & the occasional e-mail
If the fish don't bite it means that God doth smite.
Boring Guy looking to talk to people who are not boring so I can bring them down to my level
Is Beginning to sound (& look) like his fridge.
Political machine or love machine? You Decide!
Your dream date? The body of a 50 year old & the mind of a 5 year old All in one!
Desperate loser seeking a Woman or anyone willing to dress like one..
It's not what you think I'm a designer.....i wonder who will believe that..
Loves Identity Theft
Someone told me to write a letter so I wrote this: "A"
what would happen if people stopped nap'n?
I'll get you & it'll be the last thing you do.
A message comes that will shake all of (Piemerica). There is an earth quake coming.
Diner: Waiter there is a book in my drink.
Waiter: Well drink a book
If you love me so much why won't you let me be selfish & prideful?
1: You know what a real traffic jam is?
1: A big ol wreck. There's blood & Guts!
I'm not a big baby I'm just a small man.
You know I've never noticed that rail & sink rhyme
(After Coming out of the bathroom)
It was tough. The toilet paper in there ripped off easier than Puff Daddy
Did you know that telling a secret is impossible?
Guy Watching a Movie:
Save him camera man!
Oh no! That must be one of those robot cameras.
weeping They're so heartless.
Emperor MAR & Lori (alternating words)
you are the best thing from up around the top where there are clowns dancing all crazially until
i'd hate to be a grandmother because people would taunt me
I know I can love but can I wait?
yes for that is love
Emperor MAR on being a Christian:
I like to save the best for last that is why I'm glad death comes last.
The end of a tv show:
Show's over folks. Nothing more to see here.
You are intense & the tense is present.
I used to dream but then I woke up but I got tired again & went back to sleep & dreamt some more
I was a kid in those days..
I could never use the word 'we'
hoorah is like hooray except it stops earlier in the alphabet.
How are you on this unspecified day due to varying weather conditions across the continental United States?
You've outsmarted me either because you know that to be true or because I don't know if you are incorrect.
everyday decides the next day & makes the days beyond that clearer
the ignored due to various forms of ignorance (mine on it & others of it)
rushy fuzz head
the most addicting game I ever played was Taste the White Powder®
Summer is so angry
i feel like such a lazy writer because I am such a websiter
but I never wanted to write a book only drink them
i have a question for you but I don't know when it will be
i seem worse than I am
like people just see life & not the liver
If the earth were flat would I always be standing in line?
When i go to the kitchen I'm like "chill out freezer"
No one ever ignores me because they never want to talk to be to begin with.
How can a care taker & a care giver be the same thing?
"I'm a typing machine" said the computer.
I either amuse or confuse
I haven't ran out of things to say just things to talk about
Don't get smart with me because i'm dumb.
I can't get smart with many people
A Quest of Questions...
Moon Soon? (when night falls)i'm a word
& I love to scratch
& i love to rhyme
you catch my drift? if not I need a new one.
I was doing my ventriloquist act but without the ventriloquist
I'm a quiet riot yes I'm that funny
We came to an agreement because we didn't take the detour of compromise.
The hardest thing about being young is trying to rush things. Then one day you realize you didn't enjoy life.
know anywhere to earn an honest buck? because most US currency is filled with lies about eyes & various colored dyes
Experience is slow
In love. Out of the truck. Into your arms.
Check out my handwriting. oh wait you can't see it.
I may have to work but that don't mean I can't dance. I can't dance on the job but I can still dance.
I brush my teeth while I'm eating
You're making it harder. I'm trying to get smarter.
Is my wonder lost? Am I a shadow of my former self? or is my shadow what I have cut off?
No More until forevermore
A gasp is kind of a reverse scream
Clearing your throat is like getting decapitated.
I have no idea because I don't stop to think.
If I can't laugh too then other people laughing isn't so much fun. Which is the principle which makes people not like it when joke.
i like to mix up what I say
mix I what say I up to like
I ain't no fool I'm just plain cool.
so is a small 50
yeah I started out small too
You wouldn't PARchance want any of this would you? (That wasn't a pun that was just a misuse of words.)
Get a pen & a piece of paper ready.
Now write "this" down.
Are you listening?
Take a chance a colorful ribbon.
Some days I wake up just to go to sleep later.
A chair for comfort warm from the outside in.
An acorn runs. An acorn sees. An acorn ages. An acorn leaves.
Irregular sizes of clothing loathing their hangors.
i have a 'cow lick' today
i was eating beef & had a mishap
I want a baker one that is not a belly acher
20 Two 0 = Too Old
I'm the happiest man on this earth. This earth I'm standing on right now. (points at ground)
They say that nice guys finish last. I tried to ask one but he wasn't finished yet.
How do I become.. invincible?
Things which go on are going on & off like a busy highway with many exits that eventually reconnect until you realize there was no way in or out.
some roads are better than others
though i am not always on those roads I seem to make it back to them
Mac & cheese kinda sounds McDonaldsy or Irish
monsters of tasty origin are the most dangerous perhaps
I'll be in the world when I'm dead or in a cave/tunnel.
If I were to be serious people would think I'm delirious.
He said "(insert my forgotten memories here)"
I'm going through this hard time called life.
I realize it all of the time if all of the time means next to never.
systematic shut down of the system
It is my birthday soon. I'm not actually going to be rebirthed. It is just the 20th anniversary of when I was born the first time.
I can't even wash my hands without washing my hands.
My days are like night. They both consist of time.
How can the end begin if it is the end?
Being over wait takes too long.
I wrote this while driving a golf cart. I was trying to write it right side up but I was driving so wild it came out upside down. Amazing Phenomenon
Emperor MAR about the change in his appearance:
People are often complementing me on my new look saying "You look good" & so forth.
I wish people were nice to me when I was sad & ugly. That is when I needed loving when I'm down not when I'm on top of the world.
...And because of that I think I'm really really really in need of a thesaurus.
Down amongst the farthest inquisitive leisure compounded socks.
I shake the egg in the shell to mix it up for a scramblin'
I thought the way they walked was the way they talked yknow with their feet but no.
Remember that one time.. 9 o clock? It sure happened a lot.
Writing came first then typing but in between it seems the type writer was both....
They say I'm His Panic but I don't know who he is or why he is scared.
Go to the body shop & be like. "I'd like a new body"
Regular ficial was good enough for me so I became superficial
If the door is not shut then inside I will strut.
Why do they call it a mow hawk when the hair looks like uncut grass?
This is a letter. A
This is b letter. B
This is c letter. C
This is d letter. D
Are you still in "(school)"?
What? but I thought you were at home. What are you doing at school this late at night?
If you could run twice as fast as you could walk would you consider that an improvement?
I could be a quarter back or a running back but I couldn't be a wide receiver. I got the wide part but I just wasn't good at receiving.
I'm as fat as a Christmas cat.
I sneeze with ease.I'm alive enough to be a fool.
Shadow Toast: A toast meal for the whole family.
Don't say it if you ain't gonna spray it.
Don't stare too long, I'm so hot I'll burn your eyes like the sun
Good is good but isn't good a step down for you?
You are good at worst.
i don't like neverminds i like forever minds & hearts
a laughing hug vibrates
let's kiss and make up(out)
Am I too sweet or too bitter?
This Message has been paid for by no one, which is why I've sent it.
The Horses Probably Made it Worse
Yes Subject : tcejbuS seY
A Monkey of Barrels (speak up or fly down)
Pointless Warning Message #1
Repealed Warning Message #1
Bothersome Reinstatement of Call #1
Confused & Apologetic Retraction of Phone Call Offer #1
Walkish Town Like Powders
Supermarkets now offer free punching bags!
Five Hedges for a Dime
Abudance of Hearing Payments
Conversing X2 © 2005 wisper
E/\/\/\iL T\/\/( )
Ogg says "Birthday Happy"
I Figure aka (1+2=3)
An Expansion of Ideas
Tales from a Rose Garden
I'm not scary enough anymore
Pray all of the day.
If you don't know what "it" means then you must speak Spanish
If Silk was spelled with a k
Words in Context
What On Lot Of
A message which would like a reply
Update (but not the daily kind like you can find on the wonderful site of Piemerica)
O? Sho Nuf!
Dirt Covers Wrinkles
Driven to the Altar
babbling without bs
Apt. Rope Riot
News & Blues
The Window was calm but I was stuck in it.
If you sent things out into space & put the word 'space' in front of all their noun names it seems they would never run out of storage capacity.
Snow Trek: Another Thermos of Soup
Android = Electronic Male
Letters of Text or A Text of Letters
From in love to out of the truck to into your arms
Myself today a way in which to get on my way
Ink & Caper
When I stand next to someone they can always say "Next to me you're the greatest guy in the world"
Dig or wig
Stop trying & start relying
I'm in love becuase I never ran out of love
I am always younger because I keep getting older.
I don't know what stop signs are telling me to stop doing.
This is a place.
A place a place a place.
This is nowhere
I went out to dinner the other night & I ordered the duck & they handed me a $800 bill.
We have nothing in common. I don't even like the guy he is.
I came out here expecting a winter wonderland but all I got was a fall folly.
||Written by Emperor MAR|