┐Tired of Ceral that sucks?
┐Want something that doesn't?

Well then you'll love this new product! (ripoff)

From Piemerica & PanafleX Ind.

BEATIES?  Free Prize!The cereal of morons Worldwide!!
There's a free prize in every box!
This month's prize:  
a new Kill Co. Retractable Baseball bat!
or a Die Horribly Inc. non-metal, undetectable gun! (or bomb)

In every box there's

cereal! (or so it would seem)
baseball bat shaped marshmellows!
sharp & pointy metal objects!
Borax!
horrible poison!
and more?

An actual bowl!
(not drawn to scale)

So join the pain &
get murdered today!

Savage Beating

caution:  do not use milk / may cause death immediately


see also Beaties Prototype