Lessons 2010


Piemerica's Lesson of/for the Day Collection
April, August, September, October

April
Lesson Mania Week
4/12/10
Day 1- 6 Lessons
Every day is a new day.. except yesterday and all the days before it. So really today is the only new day.

News is ok but of course no news is good news right?

Being caught on fire isn't as bad as being caught while on fire because there is more than one person involved in the second situation.

If you are pessimistic about pessimism you are an optimist.

Preflexes are better than reflexes.

There are stupid questions but stupid questions are better than stupid statements.

4/13/10
Day 2- 6 Lessons
People use the phrase "out like a light' but if a light is out it isn't a light anymore.

Flashback Edition (6/12/05)
The S in Swell stands for super. Swell means super well.

Trying is better than dying unless you are trying to die.

A blem is like a minor problem y'know like a blemish.
A problem is like a pro blem it has been professionally hired to bug you.

Lessona Mania Week 2010 LIVE on Day 3
Includes Improv and uneccessary explainations of the lessons.


While falling down the stairs is bad falling up the stairs is much worse because it indicates that either gravity has changed or you are in something that is upside down.

Most entertainment is crap because there are about a trillion stars per person yet no film or record gets more than 5 stars.

4/14/10
Day 3- 5 Lessons
Age is a state of mind, the state of how old your mind is.

A photo ID can confirm your identity. Your face can confirm that you own a photo ID.

When someone requests "Listen to me." they are only referring to verbal communication and not other noises they may make.

A good idea is to put a pillow in your backpack. It will give you comfort while standing and walking like you never thought possible. Putting a backpack in your pillow is not a good idea unless you have already put a pillow in your backpack.

The great thing about performing stunts in a wheelchair is that if you get hurt you already have a wheelchair.

4/15/10
Day 4- 8 Lessons
Fun Food Fact:  Humans invented pizza in the past.

An excellent way to earn quick cash is to rent out space in your wallet.

Wow! Now this lesson is something! Of course almost anything is something.

England is the easiest place in the world to lose pounds.

When you use the phrase "More or less" you cover all possible options.

Jealousy turns enemies into rivals.

The common usage of mirrors solidify the backwards views of some.

Fun Food Fact:  God invented fruit on the third day.

4/16/10
Day 5- 6 Lessons
Here's a good 1.

If you don't not not have nobody it is because you are too negative!

Wheels were put on desk chairs because too many lazy people would lean over and fall out of their chairs to reach for things instead of getting up.

Every moment is the greatest moment of itself.

Claw hammers cannot be used properly by clawed animals.

Manliness has gone from taming wild animals that roar to controlling inanimate engines that roar.

4/17/10
Day 6- 6 Lessons
People sometimes say "Cheers!" before drinking an alcoholic beverage. This is funny because what they are drinking is actually booze.

When someone invites you to their home and refers to you as company they are hinting that their relationship with you is not personal.

Cursive handwriting is rarely used to write curses. This is interesting because the formal look to the writing makes one wish to oblige to its otherwise violently forceful suggestion.


Being fortunate is having unexpected good fortune or being lucky. Being unfortunate is being unlucky. But unfortunate is really just less than fortunate so it could just be regular fortune instead of bad fortune.

One day you'll get older and that day is today, tomorrow, and all the days after that.

Trains are invisible except for the solid parts.

August
8/3/10

The only way you can find nothing is if you are looking for something.

8/4/10
How many sneezes must a man sneeze before you call him sick? The answer my friend is blowing in the wind because germs travel by air.

8/5/10
Nothing is fool-proof. That is how foolish a fool is.

8/6/10
My dad's name is Art but other people have names too.

8/7/10
Women who want to keep their own last name when getting married never stop to think that their last name came from their father rather than their mother.

8/8/10

Cup pies would be good but they would also be too small!

8/9/10
Pick up lines are the opposites of put downs.

8/10/10
A paranormal investigator is a normal investigator with a parachute.

8/11/10
We have been going to flat screens with no tubes but YouTube has kept the tube alive.

8/12/10
Bluegrass tastes better than rock and rap. Unless the rap you are talking about is the tortilla with food in it.

September
9/30/10
If someone asks you "Do you think..?" and you say "I don't know," that means you didn't think about it.

October
10/7/10
There is no wonder as to why so many people turn to crime, it is the only way some of them can be wanted.

Top 11 Lessons of 2010
11. Every moment is the greatest moment of itself.
10. When someone requests "Listen to me." they are only referring to verbal communication and not other noises they may make.
9. My dad's name is Art but other people have names too.
8. A paranormal investigator is a normal investigator with a parachute.
7. An excellent way to earn quick cash is to rent out space in your wallet.
6. Age is a state of mind, the state of how old your mind is.
5. Fun Food Fact:  Humans invented pizza in the past.
4. There is no wonder as to why so many people turn to crime, it is the only way some of them can be wanted.
3. The only way you can find nothing is if you are looking for something.
2. Trains are invisible except for the solid parts.
1. There are stupid questions but stupid questions are better than stupid statements.

2009 | House | 2011
All Lessons 2009-2010 (unless noted)
Piemerica

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