Enornal Thirtiford
  1. Some say talking to me is like pulling teeth. They're right. It should only be done by professionals.
  2. I wasn't laughing at you. I was laughing for you, so you can see the humor in the situation.
  3. I couldn't see a thing.. unless black is a thing.

  4. I'd only date you if I were an archaeologist & you were bones.
  5. You're all so young. I've got antiques older than you.
  6. I see you have an iPod. When you've misplaced your earbuds do you ever set it to vibrate to experience the songs?
  7. I saw your video. I have that same remote! The ransom is set at 5 Gs.

  8. The answer in short is yes, in slightly less short is yeah, & in medium is indeed.
  9. I like that you use verbs. I can understand you that way.
  10. I am expressing my appreciation in this sentence, this sentence right here, the one you are reading now because you can only read now.
  11. I knew you'd understand.. after you indicated that you concurred.

  12. Y'know... If I had a fridge for every color in the alphabet I don't know what I'd have.
  13. People think it is silly when I say, "Back in my day.." yet they have no problem asking "How was your day?" You're the reason I think I had a day!
  14. I suggest you call The Police or maybe just Sting..

  15. Usually fingers don't fing but when they do ohohoh nelly, you better have a full size cabbage in your back pocket!
  16. That's what they call in the window business a window.
  17. My daughter Melody is so smart all of her teeth are wisdom teeth.

  18. I……
    ….have a lot of extra dots. Do you want some?………
  19. I'm an expert in uninary. It's easy, it's just zeros.
  20. beans beans beans beans beans beans beans beans beans beans beans beans beans beans beans
    Sorry, looks like I spilled the beans.
  21. |up|
  22. That is truly one of the finest ideas ever put to #FFFFFF.
  23. I don't go to bed before sun sun sun.
  24. Plays, I write plays. I just wrote two plays & finished a third one.
    Here comes a fourth one.... "plays"

  25. My memory is so good I unscrewed my head.
  26. I hold the world record for most hands. I have a whopping two. But the record is a 7 billion way tie. :'(
  27. I place $1,000 dollar orders all the time. I'm like "hey you, give me a thousand dollars!"
  28. I don't know Spanish but since I'm half Hispanic I figure I don't need to know it until I'm middle-aged.
  29. I can read almost any language. I just don't know what the words mean or how to pronounce them properly.
  30. I can't afford dark chocolate so I just eat regular chocolate with the lights off.
  31. I'm no expert when it comes to communication. I don't even know what a pert is, so there's no way I coulda been one.
  32. I always wanted to talk to a block of ice, that's why I do it regularly.
  33. I live by the motto:  Don't make up a motto to live by because you'll box yourself in.
  34. I graduated high school when I was 17 because I was smart.. enough to be born at the right time of the year.
  35. I know more about camels than jars of nails do but you don't see me bragging about it more than once.
  36. To say next to the least.. I'm fearless because I don't take up new fears.
  37. I'm some about using subtle word differences. If I were all about it that would be peculiar.
  38. I’m good at keeping secrets. It's getting secrets I have the problem doing…
  39. I love cracking seriousness with jokes.
  40. Roman wants answers from Wyatt? That's like asking me for a good comparative analogy.
  41. I am older than most peaches at the grocery. At least I hope so.
  42. I'm so old I've got grandkids.. of my parents, otherwise known as my kids.
  43. I'm older than the oldest person you know by at least 3 days. If the oldest person you know disagrees with me I will fight them!
  44. I'm out of  .

Assembled and Organized December 15 & 30, 2015
All written by Emperor MAR in 2015, except #17 from 2013, & #14 & #28 from 2014.
Fornitude Flotsams: Enornal Thirtiford, quotes that didn't make it into this fornitude.

2015 Piemerica
Enornal Fornitude Published by: P-I-G-S, Piemerican-International-Governmental-Society

Videos of some of this fornitude & its flotsams