Teens Rhyme the Same So
This Song is Good for the Next 7 Years
Less fear in the new year
More serene in 2013
More cheer in the new year
Things unseen in 2013
It'll all be clear in the new year
Feel more clean in 2013
Feel more near in the new year
Nothing between in 2013
Less tears in the new year
From what will convene in 2013
Less to shear in the new year
Less to dry clean in 2013
What will appear in the new year?
Less routine in 2013
Low gear in the new year
Look at life with a widescreen in 2013
So much to premiere in the new year
Things unforeseen in 2013
I'm insincere about the new year
We'll all be caught in-between 2013
December 27, 2012
Fuhfuhfuhfuhun T-Shirt & Shorts Snow Roll
December 17-21, 2012
Lesson Mania Week 2012
Hunter orange is the best gang color because it will keep you from
People talk about coasting through life as if it is boring but roller
coasters are fast & exciting.
If someone asks you, "What makes you tick?" say, "Swiss engineering."
The Olympics is the thing with the Physical Mathletes.
12/18/12 Flashback Day
To find out if someone is materialistic when you engage in conversation
with them ask them, "Do you want to talk about matter or matters?"
You can tell jocks named sports because of the names of each sport.
Baseball, basketball, football. No thought went into these names. They
just pointed & said what they saw.
The cardinal Halloween candy giving mistake is when the kids say,
"Thank you" & then you say "Anytime" and you have kids hounding
for candy everyday for the rest of your life!
Since Romney lost all oven mitts are to henceforth be called oven
The difference between jello and jello mold is a few weeks.
Umlaut is a very good word for a sideways colon. ¨
People talk about having fun but never say anything about how to go
about getting fun, lousy elitists.
Being in a boat is not an excuse to chew the moon.
There are six key points to most keys.
When someone ends a sentence with "Don't you think?" say, "I do think,
but not about that."
They say "diamonds are a girl's best friend." Unfortunately for most
girls they are imaginary friends.
Some detectives can "put a finger on it" but it just doesn't really
My cat Rambo sat on my pillow & I said, "Move Rambo, I need max
head room." When you have a full house there is going to be growing
pains but remember family matters.
You are a rebel if you turn up the treble instead of the bass.
The reason why glass toilet seats are not popular is because people are
afraid that they will cut your butt or strainus your anus.
Escaping from a prison is incredibly easy.. if you aren't a prisoner.
Just run out of the front door & yell "I've escaped" &
to get put onto dozens of people's "to murder when I get out" list.
A bar of soap really lets the suds fly.
You spoil your milk every time you give it sugary cereal.
If you have trouble remembering things then don't try to memorize this
If you are a bird watcher, take my advice. It is easier to put the
watch on their leg than on their wing.
School sucks & pre-school sucks but post-school is awesome.
Some people get offended when you tell them "Merry Christmas" &
that you are supposed to say "Happy Holidays" instead. But that is
twice as offensive because it involves at least 2 holidays. One of
which may be Christmas anyway.
When someone says, "Don't ask me why" instead ask them "Z?"
The best way to handle hoarders is to deport them to a 3rd world
country. They still get to live in filth but they won't have any money
to hoard anything.
You can tell whoever first said, "You can lead a horse to water but you
can't make it drink" is a pessimist because he points out a negative
thing you can't change. The quote should just be, "You can lead a horse
to water!" Now that's positive! There is a plethora of animals you
can't lead to water.
There are two kinds of toast but sorry, you won't find either on
Generals are in charge because they have general knowledge.
Floors happen when you are standing.
"You can run but you can't hide" is not a real rule in hide &
seek. You're welcome.
Everyone was born yesterday, just not today's yesterday.
December 13, 2012
A.M. Rang a Song, a New Song by MARS
Rang a Song is composed using all the words that can be created by the
note letters ABCDEFG. The title is an anagram of "Anagram Song."
November 25, 2012
Piemerican Disc Released 10
My first record hit sidewalks
very roughly 10 years ago. This comedy and experimental music album
with no peer because no one would associate with something so low.
classics such as
Punch My Cat in the Face, Lunch Fat Ryme, & a bemazing
November 22, 2012
Heard the Dollar Tree is having a Black
sale.. Everything is 99 cents.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012 The
presidency of Piemerica has been vacant for over 9 years after (The
Joe) Legend left office. Tonight we finally have a new one.
Congradualations to Meowzie the new President of Piemerica!
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
New Lingo: William
- Billfold, wallet Giddiot
- A giddy idiot. Nejerk
- A nerdy
jerk who is impulsive Archaisize - Make
When you really hate the term "oil."
July 19, 2012
New Old Videos
Found out that a co-host I did on blogtv 2+
ago was capped by the host. If you've ever wanted to see me out talk
someone by a margin of infinity this is for you. Learn the startling
difference between a fake mustache and a fake shave.
better Part 2 I read the chat aloud with everyone's favorite
pronunciation of XDDDDD
Lesson eCards Since
passing these around so much & I think most of them suck, I've
decided to make some from Piemerica's Lessons of/for the Day. People
are attracted to color boxes on Facebook.
July 2, 2012
Page Restored to Pieuro's
The text from Pieuro's
has been found and is linked into its site. Go to Pieuro and read the
hidden intro to Pieuro's hidden (& forever lost) guestbook.
so wht u like to do for
that is boring or unenjoyable, or fun, i prefer fun things sometimes Butterfly:
okay, so u like to be bored?
Butterfly: so is tht
u in ur pic MAR:
the human like form yes but not the other things
Butterfly: what is a
book drinker? MAR:
According to Google & my site which Google got it form, it is
who commonly drinks books. It is an old comical thing that I came up
with. There may or may not be real drinking or real books involved.
things which you enjoy doing? Butterfly:
umm i like to shop and draw MAR:
go down to the old well eh? Butterfly:
water from the well sorry about that "funny" thing i said
such sort things are you a drawer of? Butterfly:
like stillife or portraits MAR:
life be still in this hectic world we live in? Butterfly:
stillife is like non-livin things MAR:
it has no life Butterfly:
its a name MAR:
i apologize for my confusion Butterfly:
lol, accepted but it wasn't needed MAR:
think it was. I just needed to get rid of some extra apologies I had
laying around. Butterfly:
lol k MAR:
I used a
good one I hope you like it Butterfly:
or is it so bad you won't say?
oooo lol MAR:
key got stuck?
much work? Butterfly:
it is funny?
think ur much sweeter than u let on to be MAR:
too sweet I'll get eaten!
hardly eat apples MAR:
bite them hard too
what do u think about that? MAR:
bad & good & in between
scho they seemed to make me think that vowels were ladies &
consonants were dudes Butterfly:
lol what MAR:
was women & y was gay
i am back Butterfly:
wow more in common
up!!!! or ELSE! Butterfly:
ill take the else
i gotta explain everything for? lol MAR:
I like to know, mystery is great!
I'm going to the mall to blow some money MAR:
assume, coins don't blow well
knwo what's funny? MAR:
yes it is
u wanna make fun of urself? MAR:
funny plus I can make fun of someone & not get punched in the
forget then MAR:
but if i
forget "then" then i won't be able to use that word
some ppl on here make things up and r fake....im not lol MAR:
don't real people make things up the most?
information on the type (rendition) of cake you made? Butterfly:
umm i burnt it lol MAR:
type was it before hand Butterfly:
red velvet MAR:
can't complement cake being Mr. Piemerica so it pleases me when they
hads your "night" bin? Butterfly:
i guess MAR:
guess b/c you don't know?
don*t know.. they are more prettier than apostrophes
enjoyment & rest
Michael is my
legal name, 1/3 of
it. Can you guess the remaining 2/3 of my name?
You have a
bridge in your lawn?
sorry, on your lawn
Wow that is
something! Of course
almost anything is something.
i see (your
outrage! or an inrage, or
satisfying, yeah that is it
& thank me, Emperor
When people say
"hi" in place of
"hello" then I can say "lo" in place of "hello" to be like high
to join &
almost no benefits
Nah, Wow was
too pushy that is
why his shirts never sold
In regards to
howness what are
I'm hungry but
my mouth is closed
what should I do?
Do I like the
news? News is ok,
but of course no news is good news right?
Which do you
prefer, to be amused
Thanks for the
i look at them I'll think of you & how bored I was.
how are you?
not how are you
doing but how are you? yeah it is deep, like how did you come to be?
a latch of
I like mystery
so much I ignore
everything people say to me.
If i never
asked you a question
again would it be ok?
so they sweeze
babies to get baby
like a day knife
I have what I
call the "tree
style" I wear a green shirt & khaki pants like a tree &
trunk. I also have an orange shirt for the fall style. I'm large so I
look well as a tree. Some people can't tell the difference in the
I want to look
fatter because it
makes for good jokes about myself. Look fatter, not so much be fatter.
My brain, it is
so big it must be
fat. Or I'm so fat my brain must be big.
I have a bottle
of pilot's blood?
my day is
usually like me so if
you ask how I am the day is similar not always true but quite close
I'd ask how you
are but I am
heartless & don't care.
February 26, 2012
Chauffeurs make the best minions. They never
you wrong, although if you're their boss you should be steering them..
Chauffeurs are a complex people. Mad props for life to all those
chauffeurs out there. You know who you are.
• I don't know why noodle is a
slang term for
head. I guess it was named before the proliferation of Italian food in
America and someone confused a meatball for a noodle but I digress
because in the winter gress isn't as green no mor'.
• I wonder how many times I've said, "I'll never forget the time..."
and have actually forgotten. I guess I'll never know.. I guess because
maybe in the distant future of 2012(!) there will be a brain science
man who reads my brain and tells me.
• You're right I should sell my barn before the cow stealing convention
comes to Muncie.
• To me the new Pepsi logo is like having the Coca-Cola logo/signature
in Comic Sans MS.
• Something to say on January 31, "If it doesn't snow tonight I'll have
to wait until next month!"
• I held Popsicles under my chin and froze my adam's apple. A fresh new
• People laughed at my joke from 3/14/04? Its a Christmas miracle! ...
or a December 19th miracle.. which is even better.. because.. no one
ever hears about those.
• Archibald the Snow Man had a name that was hard to rhyme so we
thought all day and we thunk all night and nothing we could find. We
tried to change his name but he would have no such thing. He insisted
then he listed his family tree for it to stay the same.
Jibber Jabber 2012 Established
• I'm always stuck typing
of writing it. Lowsy technology that lets me tell jokes to the world
instantly with potential feedback. I'm gonna get history for my
birthday and that'll show me not to complain.
• I didn't know what they were before they existed either.
• I knew it! ..now that I've read what you told me.
• I am no stranger to people I've met.
• Trash is misunderstood like King Kong
• ¿HA! I'm brain thingy for thought gettings were yeah. Maybe I'm an
idiocy perfectionist but it took a lot of thought to say something so
• You guys are actually getting a good work out if you are laughing.
You're burning a lot of calories and tightening your abs. Come see me
every night. My show costs less than a personal trainer.
• What is your favorite court: tennis, basketball, or
New Comedy Quotes Collection:
I & I
1. I use comedy as a mask to hide my unfunniness.
2. I like to think outside the box except when I'm in a box, then I
like to think of how to get out of said box.
3. I am as the French say, when they speak English, a "goofball."
4. I wonder how many times I've said, "I'll never forget the time..."
and have actually forgotten.
5. I never taught my dog to sit because he already knew how.
6. I heard a police siren and thought R2-D2's crazy cousin was on the
7. I had a lighter and I tried to lighten my shirt with it but the
shirt just turned black.
8. Being a comedian is tough. .. When I run out of material I buy
bigger clothes. .. Sorry those last two sentences weren't related.
9. We had a long talk about how to write in shorthand.
Q & A
Being 1: Do you ever answer yes or no questions?
Being 2: Yes
Being 1: That is what I thought because I considered both options.
Q &.. well that's all..
1. So how have you been.. maintaining your eyesight? I maintain mine by
not sticking sharp things in my eyes.
2. What is your advice to a man who doesn't exist?
3. Have you ever heard sound?
4. What is your shallowest, brightest secret?
5. I saw a sign around Christmas that said "Seasons Greetings." How
come we only greet the seasons during the winter?
6. Since ethnicity is not a competition instead of using the word
"race" I prefer to say "fun run." What fun run are you?
7. I hate questions that ask me things.
Valentine's Day Collection of
It is easy to be romantic when
you are in
love. All you have to do is tell the truth.
Single people, live everyday as though it were the last day of your
life. Even better married guys, live everyday as though it were the
first day of your wife.
The best place to fall in love is in front of a laundromat.
Money can't buy love unless it is Valentine's Day apparently.
Never wear your heart on your sleeve because you may need to sneeze.
You know you're in a good relationship when instead of wanting to ring
each other's necks you want to ring each other's finger.
People without loved ones usually love fives, tens, twenties, fifties,
Become an ugly moron because opposites attract.
Giving a gift on Valentine's Day is a way to say "I love you." Giving
just a hug on Valentine's Day is a way to say, "I love you but I'm
Love in your tummy is like the least yummy place to have it.
Love is like butter. It is better when spread.
Top 5 Lessons of 2011
5 .The sarcastic remark "very
4. Asia Minor and Asia Augmented 7th are long time enemies.
3. Putting a tiger into a bear cage won't make the tiger a bear but it
will make the bear cage a tiger cage.
2. Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer had a very shiny nose. Unfortunately
his brother Barry the black nosed reindeer didn't and one foggy
Christmas Eve he was hit by a car.
1. Fun Food Fact: The Hamburger was named after the French and Indian
Top 3 ways to loose
money in a
3. Burn down the insurance company instead of
2. Using the classic sales pitch &
it into action,
"We Burn Money!
1. Play hide & go seek with the funds